how to finish a burger meal.

at these times of global financial crisis, it's a sin to make waste. precious food, whose market prices rise exponentially everyday, must not be taken for granted. this is similar to what your grandma used to say to you when you were young (ages ago, he3!!!).

focus panda, focus. ok, here i am, looking at my half-eaten burger. i suddenly became full. maybe because a few seconds before, i had gobbled-up french fries and dipped these decadently in mayo-ketsap mix. the said fries are good. it is with a distinct but delicious taste comparable to the fries of the golden arches, which by the way, i still rate as The Best.

anyway, going back to the burger, which now looked to me like anything but delectable, in between my hands, and held it there, waiting, or thinking what to do next. i had definitely lost my appetite.

should i throw it into the bin? come to think of it, it would be an awful waste. marami kayang nagugutom sa payatas... (there are many people starving in far away payatas, metro manila). ang sagot, bakit? kasalanan ko ba na nagugutom sila? (the answer, is it my fault that they are hungry?). hmm.. there is a point there, somewhere.

after my food-poisoning incident last november, i seldom eat-out anymore. furthermore, i seldom eat at all, moreso if it is a cuisine from the sub-continent (the culprit last year). never you mind, i'd rather starve. i dunno, alien food to me suddenly became sinistrous. close to paranoia perhaps. there could be an "e. coli" or salmonella hidden, swimming in that yummy-looking pungent orange sauce. goodluck! (emphasis at the K).

shaking my head to clear the mind. whew! enough! i have to finish this. i could hear my grandma again, yes ma, i will finish this (grumbling). this is bad, i am hallucinatingkh. i gave a sigh, the show must go on. then, i'm on. one bite after another, it's beginning to be difficult. it's an effort to swallow it down. now and then, it seems the burger is struggling to go out my mouth. but i went on. look, i am making progress.

you know, the hardest part is that last bite. i stared at it for a while. good grief, the last morsel. i am almost ready to blow. the water at the dam is in critical level, it is at the brim. where is the nearest toilet by the way?..... pause, aim, shoot it netless into the ring!

then, after all that has been said and done, nothing is left of the burger, it's done.

sit back straight, tip the head from side-to-side,

take a sip of cola, just to push it down,

and give a resounding belch if you can.

then raise your arms in a V. saying, aah! victory at last!

mission accomplished. what a nice way to finish a burger meal.

khallas!

Long, Long Driving

Long drives from Al Ain to Dubai would take approximately 2 hours, and could be a daunting task because you are looking forward into the next couple of hours driving alone in the middle of nowhere. Furthermore, it could just be outright boring.
That is unless you do something about it. He3!!! Actually, you can do many things to keep you busy. Herein listed below are some suggestions to consider:
1. Listen to the Radio. Music can keep you company during long driving. Singing with your favorite hits or maybe shouting with it as if there is no tomorrow bro! However, you can only do that when you leave Al Ain town proper because it is difficult to catch english radio station frequencies there. I dunno if it is intentional or somethin’ b’coz even if the digital radio’s frequency is fixed in an english dubai channel, there is still a bellowing habibi comes thru the car radio. But that is just temporary. When you get to the fringes of the town, radio channels are back to normal. Keep on rollin’ baby!!!! Haya-haya habibi!!!! Nyeek!!!
2. Race. Yup, you’ve read it right, race. That four letter word that most people fear. I am not actually encouraging people out there to do careless drag-racing in the Dubai-Al Ain Highway. Nope, not that kind of race. Then, what the heck am I driving at? Well, let me explain it like this, play and imagine that you are in the Grand Prix. Thunderin’ motor-noise and cars passing at high speed. Whow! Adrenaline pumpin’ dude! Get the Tokyo Drift? Then continue, choose a competitor; there are many ways to find one. Observe the traffic population. Nope not that new shiny 4WD that sped past you, its waaaay outta your league. How about that wretched looking ancient dirty-white hatchback that is screeching thru the road on your left side? Nope. Mismatch. Look at the front-right side, there booming a 10-year-old Gringo 4WD. This is the competition? Why not? And then, Bang!!! Shot Fired!!! And the race is on!!! Run in full speed past the Gringo to challenge him, he will get what you mean. “Days of Thunder” is here!
3. Speed-Cam Watching. Out there in the desolate desert wasteland, in the wild high highway (he3! Similar to “the wild high seas”, get it?), where you thought you could have peace and tranquility and speed-up to your whim. It is just you, sand, breeze, rustle of grass, stars in the sky, WELL YOUR WRON-G! There are these loathed, evil devices called speed-cameras to harass you and make your life miserable. You would be forced to slow down and drive at 139 km/hr (a hairline below the speed limit) especially when you see a speedometer a few meters ahead. If you had just passed that hated device, immediately zoom above 150 or more and stay on guard for the next one at the left side of the road.
4. Speed Lane Hugging. The left-most lane near the road-island is the “speed lane”. Where all the newly minted, high-powered, bombastic and flashy automobiles speed-by, leaving you green with envy. They run to 200 and with headlights full-blast (sometimes light flashing), telling anybody blocking their way; “get the hell out of my way”. Since many people do not want to be bothered by these “show-offs”, the second lane is the popular choice for peaceful driving. But then again, who wants a peaceful-boring drive? Not me! He3! Wait for you chance to get inside the first lane, coast is clear? Go with headlights in full-blast too! Run to the limit. Chase away slow cars and make the sheep go to the second lane. However, when a much faster car approaches your rear, sway to the second lane, as the alpha passes, then spring back again to the first. Be persistent, consistently harass the sheep, mind you, you are a fine shepherd breed! Ruff!!! Ruff!!! You’ll be reaching the emirate-border in no time!
5. Pick a fight. No, not the actual physical thing, you rascal. Look for something unusual. How about a car with light in-full-blast but it not running fast enough? Good sport! He3! Go in swing in front of him and step on the ciliñador amigo! He will eat smoke and be humiliated for sure. The bloke would try to out-maneuver you and retaliate. Thus, you have your dog-fight. Several twists and turns would happen in the contest. And before you know it, you are in sight of the glittering Dubai Business Bay over-passes. Argh pirates! Land ahoy!!!
Please be noted that these written above are only suggestions that may relieve you of your boredom and are not intended in anyway; in getting you killed. Caution must be undertaken not to overdo any said tips and considerations.
Remember to drive safely (talking about U-Turn, he3!!!).
Khallas!

is this Manila?

Have you been in MMDA-controlled Manila already?

I came from a Singaporean vacation last October 2007. That country was hell of a clean space. You know what I mean if you have been there?

I have lived in Singapore for two years starting from 2003. Honestly, I was impressed because the place was clean and orderly. All the things I wish my country are to be.

But lo and behold, I was surprised. In my return visit last time, I was delightfully surprised that Manila that I know to be was dirty, was now (unbelievably) pretty clean. I am looking for reasons to explain this phenomenon. It may be an election period so that roads and by-ways are clean and squeaky. It may be a something else, but the heck with it. As far as I am concerned, it is political will. And that is rare. Political will is hard to come by these days.

For example, in the San Pedro-Biñan National road, concrete establishments are demolished because they have encroached into public territory. These structures have been there since time immemorial. No public office can get them out of these public lands nor have the political will to evict these squatters of the same. At present, the Old National High-way needs to be widened. No other entity has the political will to do this except for the MMDA.

I give my kudos to the Dictator of Metro Manila (MMDA) whom political will is stronger than that of neither any of the existing political party nor the prevalent kiss-arse attitude of our times.

We need professional and strong politicians now than ever. I hope they come in our time of need. God help us.

Mabuhay ang Pilipinas!!!

our election

This is the grassroots level of democracy and fair an election should be, ideally. Popular right of suffrage was invented by the Americans and was propagated throughout the world after the Second World War. This idea was given a class room trial at the time of the Thomasites (a term for the American teachers that came into the Philippines on-board the U.S.S. Thomas). Voting for the class officers, a class of 40 pupils, after canvassing, to the shock of the Americans, found out that a total of 53 pupils have voted. Was it a deficiency in mathematics? Beats me, better ask someone else then. Though democracy came early in our shores, electioneering and rigging comes just shortly behind.

Far from being an American and similarly so as being fair, I admit that, I participated in this “barangay” election period, as biased as I can be in favor of my ex-choir friend more so when I found out that he was running for a seat in the barangay council.

Going on, I never met him when I was on a 5-week “pearl of the orient” vacation last October 2007 not until just hours after the elections. When we did, it was kinda’ arguing about the democratic contest that he has just lost. We invited him to join us in a post-election drinking spree (I drink occasionally, and this is an occasion. Hehehe!!!). Although, during the campaign period, there was an alcohol ban, (drinking is not allowed. Well, when you are caught ofcourse. He3!!!) We nevertheless have done what all devotees of the Oktoberfest would do, DRINK & be merry!!!

I remembered the time when I were in college and ran for Grad Class Vice-Preisdent. The campaign period was rather good for me, until it was finally over. The “over” part was hard to accept. I was in the losing end of the election story. It did not fare very well to my ego. So I was accusing the other side of all conceivable things to justify their win. Rubbish. It was a landslide, it was decisive, and it was a knockout. It was uncontestable. Then ego turned to grief. Most of my running-mates cried. I did not cry with them, really. I was gazing up the sky, wondered what had had happened. There we were, on our backs on weary and weathered limestone, wallowing in despair on top of the battlements of old intramuros, looking for signs in the night, that maybe, all of these talk of defeat was just a really bad dream.

I understand my friends’ loss. I really do. I can relate with the sucker that he is now. Maybe it’s because of the sucker who I really have been. So when we were giving all his lamentations to us half-drunks, we just took it and gave encouragements and expressions of support to our recently defeated/injured friend. Sigh! That’s life.

Well, back into 2007, the winners of the barangay elections were the incumbent. And, as the gossip from the grapevine suggests (from inside the FX, from the wet market shoppers, vendors and from your regular corner bums), a PhP 1,000.00 reward was offered for those who voted for favored candidates (?). Although no legal protest were filed in Court by the aggrieved parties, the bribery issues was generally accepted as truth by the population. So, nothing could be done according to the eyes of the Law. But as far as I am concerned, the maiden Law became a whore of the highest bidder. Darn….

“The people deserve its government”. There are many things to say about his, but I will abstain, for now.

If money is the root if all evil, also, money is a requirement for election victory. money is the root of all evil. Could it be deducted then, that election victory is the root of all evil?

So, the night ended in awful sorrow for our friends’ loss. But hey, let us just account what had had happened, learn the lesson in it. And then, just move on. In the end, it is a question if you are still the man you still are and you're the man you hope to be? After this struggle, I hope you held you’re balls well. It is all that you have when you face your Creator.

As for me, we hope you do your best in life and in all jovial favor I say, let us drink to that!!!!!

Dumi ng Isip

Pagsapit ng alas sais ng gabi, tapos na ng oras ng opisina, talagang hindi kaagad ako umaalis. Hindi ito sa kadahilanang gusto ko ngang magtrabaho pa, bagkus ako ay nag-iipon pa ng sapat na lakas ng loob (o “inner strength”) bago magsimulang lumakad patungo sa pinaka-malapit na taxi stand na mahigit 600 metro ang layo mula sa aking matiwasay na kinauupuan. Hala, mind-power ang gamitin na "motivation" para mapag-tagumpayan ang katamaran ng katawan. Nais pong ipabatid ng manunulat na ngayon ay nasa kalagitnaan tayo ng mabanas na tag-init, dito sa mala-impiernong lugar na ito. Kaya isipin nyo na lang na 41 centigrado ang temperatura sa labas at naglalakad ka. Bukod sa baka mahuli ka ng “safety officer” kasi ala kang hard-hat na naglalakad sa loob ng construction site, tagaktak pa ang pawis mo sa noo, likod, leeg, kili-kili at basang-basa na din ang salung-(kung ano man ang meron kayo, hehehe). Ito ang kalbaryo ko araw-araw sa pag-uwi.

Ngunit langit pa iyan kung ikukumpara sa mararanasan mo kapag tinawag ka ng inang kalikasan habang ika‎‎‎‎’y nasa 200 metro pa lamang ng iyong paglalakbay mula sa nilayasan mong tanggapan. Ay sus ginuu! Ano po ang gagawin mo? Ako ba ay‎ babalik sa unang baitang ng gusali (nandun ang opisina, pero nasa ground floor ka na ngayon eh) o tatapusin ko ang natitirang 400? Buti na lang may palikurang malapit sa “finish line” (opisina ng mga kaibigan ko sakabilang dulo ng project site) kaya naisip ko din na ituloy ang laban. Pinagpapawisan ka na ng butil-butil at hindi maihakbang ng mabuti ang mga paa. Baka kasi may makatakas na “perwisyo” sa ano kapag naluwagan ang “control” mo doon sa kuwan eh. Hindi magiging kaaya-ayang sitwasyon yun malamang. Kaya sige, “mind over matter” ang gamitin mong litanya upang mapanatili ang iyong dignidad at kahihiyan sa harap ng mga nagkalat na mga pana, patan at kung anu-ano pang mga lahi sila. Sa oras na iyun, wala kang pakialam kung sa planetang Mars pa sila galing. Basta ang nasa isip mo, sugod kapatid!!! Sugod!!! Tuloy ang ipit-pwet na paglakad patungo sa kaligtasan (syet! 200 metro na lang!). Kung pagninilay-nilayan mo ang iyong kasalukuyang kalagayan, maslalo kang mapapa-aga (gets mo?), kaya mabuti pa na ibaling mo ang iyong isip sa ibang direksyon. Sumagot ang naghihirap mong sentido, “SAAN???”. Teka lang po, nagpapayo lang naman, pero dapat malibang ka kasi hindi mo kayang damdamin ang maduming kalagayan mo ngayon. “ANO NGA BA ANG DAPAT GAWIN KO?” ang hibik ng isip, teka ulit, naaalala mo ba na eksena na nabasa mo sa libro ni Bob Ong? Iyung tungkol sa pag-luwal niya ng kahihiyan sa gitna ng silid-aralan noong siya‎ kindergarden pa lamang? O dili kaya‎’y noong naranasan ng kamag-aral mo noong highschool ka (opo, hindi po ako iyung nagkalat, peksman!) na isa ka pa sa nag-kutya at bumarubal sa pagkatao kanya? At ngayon, nasa gitna ka na ng, hindi silid-aralan kundi ng construction site at napapaligiran ka ng hindi kamag-aral kundi mga trabahador at mga pahinante? Di ba nakakahiya si “engineer” kapag bumulwak sa sentro ng sangkatauhan ang nakaririmarim na tinatago ng iyong kalooban? Malamang, ikamamatay mo ang kahihiyan na daranasin kapag nagka-totoo nga ang mga hula.

Ngunit hindi rin, hindi pa, eto pa ikaw ngayon at lumalaban, mamatay-matay na sa kahirapan pero tuloy pa rin ako… “aba! nakuha pang kumanta?” ang tirada ng peligrosong kokote. Hindi mo namamalayan, malayo na ang iyong nararating. Akalain mo iyun, malapit na ang finish line?

Yeesss!!! Iyak ng loob, napapikit, tumingala sa langit at kagat-ngipin ka na sa tuwa ngayon. Closer....

Hoy! Wag mong kalimutan ang “control” at baka ngayon ka pa magkakalat, malapit ka sa mga kaibigan mo! Di ba mas nakakahiya iyun kapag magsabog ka ng lagim sa harap nila?

Oo nga ‘no? ang sagot mo naman.

Susmaryosep! Nagkakaroon ka na ba ng schizophrenia? Sino ba ang kausap mo? Masama na talaga ito!

Hindi bale, ang mahalaga, makaligtas ka sa maduming sitwasyon na ngayo‎’y bumabalot sa buong katauhan mo at sinusubukan ang katatagan ng iyong “mental health”.

Heto ka na sa harap ng pinto ng backdoor ng opisina nila. Gusto mo dun pumasok kasi mas kokonti ang taong dumadaan dun, mas malaya kang gumalaw, so-to-speak. Buong pagkukunwari ka sa pag-project ng “coolness” sa lahat nang maaaring makasalubong mo para wala silang mabatid sa tunay mong kalagayan ngayon. Walang bahid ng panganba ang kara mo. Teka, may bahid na kaya iyung brief ko? Malalaman ko sa madaling panahon. Sige, go! Lakad lang ng normal. Butil-butil talaga at na-tulo na, este, dumadaloy na pala ang mga dapat tumulo lang. Pigil pa din ang hindi dapat tumulo (at hindi ito ung sakit ah!). Parang gusto ko nang magpalabas ng dig-low (kabaligtaran ng dighay, o dig-high?) o kaya, simpleng utot.

Anyway, gusto kong magpalabas ng konting hangin, kahit konti lang para maibsan ang “pressure” sa tyan ko. Pero hindi dapat asahan iyun (Lesson #1, never trust a fart), kasi malamang, may kasamang tropa iyun kapag lumabas. Nangyari na sa akin iyan sa Singapore. Papasok ako ng opisina noon at nakatayo sa bus. May hangin na ibig lumabas sa pwet ko. Akala ko, simpleng utot lang iyon kaya pinayagan kong lumabas ang konting hangin sa aking kalooban. Syet! May sumama! Kaya ilang segundo lang at umalingasaw ang mala-posonegrong simoy sa loob ng bus. Lumaki ang mga mata ng mga intsik at nabahuan ang mababahong iba. Nakakahiya sa mga intsik, pero isa itong higanti sa iba, sila naman ang mabahuan “for a change”. Hehehe. Patay-male pa din ako sa buong diskurso ng byahe na ito. Sa oras na pati ako ay apektado na din sa baho at polusyon na dulot ko, kaya minabuti ko na bumaba na (Actually, naghihintay lang ako ng susunod na bus stop para hindi ako “obvious”. Ang lufeet ko talaga 'no!Kaya hala, pindot ng stop botton at pa-simpleng na akong bumaba. (Inhale!) Ang sarap ng sariwang hangin! Refreshing!!!

Nasaan na ako, naglalakad pa din at ayun na ang toilet! Malapit na ako! Wala namang istorbo sa paglakad ko. Bukas ng Toilet! Upo sa trono! At nang ilang napakasarap na saglit, nadama ko ang isang mahaba at mapagpalang buntong-hininga. Tapos na! Lumaya ang bait sa parusa at kahirapan. Para bang lumindol sa burol, nahati sa gitna ang sanctuwaryo ng templo at nagbukas ang kalangitan. Haaaaaaaaaay!!! Salamat poh!!! It is done......

Grabe ‘no? kaya ako noon, bago umalis ng opisina ko, inilabas ko na sa palamus-unan ang lahat-lahat ng aking sama ng loob para hindi ko maranasan ang mga paghihirap na nakalahad sa itaas. Kung iisipin mo, oo nga naman.

“PEACE” PO TAYO!!!!!!